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    October 15, 2009

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    I’ve been meaning to write this post for a while now on why and how did I started wearing the hijab. I come from a family of pretty much “liberal” Muslims (though there is no such thing as a conservative or liberal Muslim. There is just one type of Muslim). My parents never forced me to pray 5 times a day nor do they asked me to wear a veil and a proper attire when I leave the house and so does all of my siblings. Growing up, up until recently I thought I had a sufficient knowledge about my own religion but boy was I wrong. In these past few months I started doing some research, reading up books, hadiths and the Quran and I couldn’t be more ashamed of calling myself a Muslim before because I’ve realised how blissfully ignorant I was. Islam itself means submitting to the will of Allah SWT. How am I considered a Muslim if I put myself and my desires before Him? Very often, such submission is difficult. Sometimes it seems that everything that happens is bad, and we wonder how Allah SWT could desire this for us. And sometimes the things He asks of us are difficult to do, either because it seems too much to ask, or because it seems pointless or out of date. In times like this, submission becomes a struggle. We really have to work to find our trust in Allah SWT. We really have to do battle with our souls to admit that what we want or what we think doesn’t seem to be what’s right or best. Should we bother? For me, the answer is yes, we should bother. Allah SWT tests us. He sends difficulties our way to see how we cope. He wants to see if we will keep trying even when it’s a challenge. He wants to see if we will maintain our faith in Him, and trust in Him. I’m glad that I’ve got the second chance to renewed my faith and not follow everything blindly since I’ve learned the reasoning and the facts behind each practices. So, when I started wearing the veil, I know it is much more than a piece of cloth covering my hair. A hijab is in the modest way you dress, it is in the words you chose to speak and the act that you chose to do in public - everything you do will somehow relates back to Islam so you have to be extra careful not to tarnish the image. It was very scary at first when I started wearing the veil, I know how judgmental and mean people can get. That’s one of the reasons why I kept putting it off. I’ve received compliments and a fair share of snide remarks and discrimination. People who say that I wear the veil because I was forced to or suggest it is some kind of oppression is really an insult towards my intelligence. Truthfully, I’ve felt more freedom than ever by wearing my headscarf and loose clothing. I don’t have to worry about a bad hair day and a muffin top anymore, what a relief! And no more annoying promoters coming up to me and speaking in Chinese while I try conjuring up words and babble incoherently because apparently wearing a veil equates to being a Malay. Harhar. p/s: No, I am not trying to shove my religion down nobody’s throat. Please have a sense of humour and a little open mindedness :)

    I’ve been meaning to write this post for a while now on why and how did I started wearing the hijab. I come from a family of pretty much “liberal” Muslims (though there is no such thing as a conservative or liberal Muslim. There is just one type of Muslim). My parents never forced me to pray 5 times a day nor do they asked me to wear a veil and a proper attire when I leave the house and so does all of my siblings. Growing up, up until recently I thought I had a sufficient knowledge about my own religion but boy was I wrong. In these past few months I started doing some research, reading up books, hadiths and the Quran and I couldn’t be more ashamed of calling myself a Muslim before because I’ve realised how blissfully ignorant I was.

    Islam itself means submitting to the will of Allah SWT. How am I considered a Muslim if I put myself and my desires before Him? Very often, such submission is difficult. Sometimes it seems that everything that happens is bad, and we wonder how Allah SWT could desire this for us. And sometimes the things He asks of us are difficult to do, either because it seems too much to ask, or because it seems pointless or out of date. In times like this, submission becomes a struggle. We really have to work to find our trust in Allah SWT. We really have to do battle with our souls to admit that what we want or what we think doesn’t seem to be what’s right or best. Should we bother? For me, the answer is yes, we should bother. Allah SWT tests us. He sends difficulties our way to see how we cope. He wants to see if we will keep trying even when it’s a challenge. He wants to see if we will maintain our faith in Him, and trust in Him.

    I’m glad that I’ve got the second chance to renewed my faith and not follow everything blindly since I’ve learned the reasoning and the facts behind each practices. So, when I started wearing the veil, I know it is much more than a piece of cloth covering my hair. A hijab is in the modest way you dress, it is in the words you chose to speak and the act that you chose to do in public - everything you do will somehow relates back to Islam so you have to be extra careful not to tarnish the image. It was very scary at first when I started wearing the veil, I know how judgmental and mean people can get. That’s one of the reasons why I kept putting it off. I’ve received compliments and a fair share of snide remarks and discrimination. People who say that I wear the veil because I was forced to or suggest it is some kind of oppression is really an insult towards my intelligence. Truthfully, I’ve felt more freedom than ever by wearing my headscarf and loose clothing. I don’t have to worry about a bad hair day and a muffin top anymore, what a relief! And no more annoying promoters coming up to me and speaking in Chinese while I try conjuring up words and babble incoherently because apparently wearing a veil equates to being a Malay. Harhar.

    p/s: No, I am not trying to shove my religion down nobody’s throat. Please have a sense of humour and a little open mindedness :)

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    Maddie, isn’t this gorgeous?*hints* You will most certainly be there :)

    Maddie, isn’t this gorgeous?*hints* You will most certainly be there :)

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    October 14, 2009

  • So…..there is no chance for me to delete all of my previous posts in one shot without deleting my whole account and I don’t want to do that and lose all of the wonderful people in my Tumblr. I guess I’ll have to do that one by one. I just want a fresh start you know? Since tomorrow would be my last day at work (I got retrenched), I would have all the time in the world. Sigh, never thought I would get laid-off. Reality is finally giving me the ol’ slap in the face.

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  • Hello good people of Tumblrland, can any of you please help me out. How can I delete all of my previous posts without deleting my account?

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    October 1, 2009

  • I should probably update my blog. Probably.

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    I don’t think I ever cried watching a cartoon before. ‘Up” was amazing.

    I don’t think I ever cried watching a cartoon before. ‘Up” was amazing.

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